These Last Days

So no baby yet and I'm getting the same old tired question... "How are you feeling?" My blanket answer? "Oh, Ok, I guess" Another comment I frequently hear is "How can she keep going with the girls and getting other things done?" It's not easy, but I can't keep the girls locked up. I'm about to rock their world and I have to keep it as "normal" as possible at least for a little while longer. I get a lot of pity looks of what I hear as "My goodness is she big and uncomfortable." The truth is they're right. It's with a very heavy heart that I say that. I really went into this pregnancy with a more than enthusiastic attitude. It is my last pregnancy and I feel guilty for wishing it over. I wish my reason for wishing it over were simply that I can't wait to hold that baby boy but mostly my reason is wanting to put on my own shoes without the help of a 4 and 2 year old. It's a sad day when a 2 year old has to help me put on socks!!! Don't get me wrong, I thank God for Bella who is always more than happy to help but I am the adult after all, who should be helping her!

I'm averaging 4 hours of sleep a night and can't help but wish for the 2 hour feeding schedule to begin. At least I would be guaranteed several naps in the daytime! The baby is most active at 11pm and 4 am, which of course wakes me then I can't fall back asleep till about 6am. I spend those 2 hours making lists in my head, trying not to wake the rest of the family, and of course wishing for sleep. If he can keep up that schedule once he's out here, you won't hear me complain.

I pray this baby comes this week. I am at the end of my rope here and keeping up appearances has become more than difficult. But again, I must do what I must do. In no way should the girls be put out. Lord knows that will happen soon enough.
Well, here's to another week!